New Year, New You

That time of the year as one comes to an end and a new one is heading in can hold so much promise, that life will transform from what it currently is to a wished for ideal. This can sometimes appear as new year resolutions. We’re talking a fresh start, a new you or a brand new self discipline as examples. However you may have realised that the life you wish for just won’t materialise and requires some efforts, some skills and beliefs from you. In my almost twenty years experience as a therapist this is one of the points clients recognise that therapy could help with. The point s include identifying certain barriers that are often a mixture of psychological, emotional and deeply held beliefs about one’s self.

In what ways can therapy help to make these ideals become reality?

One of the major ways that therapy helps is working with a client to help them to understand themselves. Then depending on what you most want from your therapy at any given point, therapy can help with increasing motivation and self belief for example. Or looking at current thoughts and behaviours that don’t currently support the self and instead work towards ones that do. Therapy can also help to identify the steps and efforts involved, going at your individual pace. Working with a therapist, whether that is one that is near you in Kingston as I am or online, can be like going on a journey together, where you the client are in the driver seat. The therapist in turn is alongside you helping with navigating the way. They use their experience of regularly thinking about and looking at difficult terrains from different perspectives in their work to support you. Bringing your attention to possible hazards and blocked roads, whilst also fully respecting that it is your journey.

But what about…

There are so many people, situations and outcomes that can be feared in life. For example what if you don’t realise the changes you want in your life, so why bother? Which would be fear in some guise. What if you do realise the changes? Another fear in another guise. The way some therapists such as myself work, is to be alongside you for as long as you need to reach your new you. That may be short term, such as six to twelve weeks. Or it may be long term, for the year, maybe longer. In my experience it is a mix and when clients know it is their journey and it is they who decide they have arrived at their destination, this enables them to focus on working on themselves and the life they want to live. If clients know every single detail of what that life looks like before they begin, yes that can be helpful. Sometimes though it can hold clients back in a kind of paralysis thinking they have to have all the answers and tools before they begin. However in my experience ideas can be enough and plenty to begin therapy with. So another perspective is to take one step, assess, breathe, then take another step. Learning and becoming further resourced comes as you make your way from the you now to the new you.

Find out more about working in therapy to achieve your new year goals

Wishing you a happy new year, and if you would like to find out how we can work together towards a new year, new you then you can contact me either via email jessica@rightinsightcounselling.co.uk or by phone 07795 253 457.